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The Rapture will occur on May 21, 2011 (fingers crossed!)

“As it was in the days of Noah, so shall it be in the days of the Son of Man.”—Luke 17

We covered crazy old coot, Harold Camping last year around this time when Camping and his dim-witted followers/employees announced that the Rapture was coming on May 21, 2011. Of course, Mr. Camping has made incorrect predictions in the past about the end of the world, but this hasn’t stopped him from trying again (hey, a stopped clock is right twice a day, isn’t it?). This time Camping is SO SURE that he got the math right, that he and his followers/employees have announced an aggressive advertising campaign with tee-shirts, tracts, postcards, stickers, outdoor advertising and even e-Bibles that the younger set can use on their iThingees.

Family Radio Inc., Camping’s company has also set up, where you can learn all about the various ways the great man figured out when the Rapture would take place. How convenient that this is all happening when Camping himself is only 88-years-young. If his batshit crazy wish fulfillment nonsense turns out to be correct, HE’LL NEVER HAVE TO DIE. (And what’s more, when the Rapture comes, he’ll be young again! All the people in Heaven are in their prime. We know this because a kid who had an NDE told Gretchen Carlson all about it on Fox News!).

It’s all just a matter of simple math! From The Tennessean:

According to Camping’s prediction, the Rapture will happen exactly 7,000 years from the date that God first warned people about the flood. He said the flood happened in 4990 B.C., on what would have been May 21 in the modern calendar. God gave Noah one week of warning.

Since one day equals 1,000 years for God, that means there was a 7,000-year interval between the flood and rapture.

Got it?

Billboards like the one above are about to start appearing in Louisville, St. Louis, Detroit, Little Rock, Omaha, Kansas City, Fort Wayne, Ind., and Bridgeport, Conn. There are already 40 such signs in the Nashville area alone. Family Radio Inc., will also be sending RVs around the country with witnesses for Camping’s Rapture date prediction.

I look at it this way: I’d love it if Camping were correct and all the Christians (including Sarah Palin, the Teabaggers, Bryan Fischer, etc) get whisked up to Heaven en masse with Baby Jesus and assigned their fucking harps. We’d all wake up in a much saner world on May 22, 2011, if you ask me. Good riddance.

Previously on Dangerous Minds:
2012 is for Suckers, part 2: Old Coot says Rapture nigh

Posted by Richard Metzger | Discussion
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The ‘Green Dragon’ Christian Conspiracy Theory

The most amazing thing was posted over at Right Wing Watch. It’s a condensed version of a trailer for a multipart video workshop called Resisting the Green Dragon, purportedly an expose of how the environmental movement is seeking to destroy Christianity and take control of the world. It features a cavalcade of rightwing Christian blowhards, such as flaming asshole Bryan Fischer and his bigoted lil’ pal from the Family Research Council, Tony Perkins.

What a silly, silly, super lame scam. This is lamer than those fucking Y2K Christian videos they used to advertise on late night cable TV. If you still need proof that American-style (Republican) Christianity is little more than an organized system of ignorance, then look no further!

Although I doubt that I, personally, could hack much more than three minutes of this, Resisting the Green Dragon looks like it has the potential to be a Reefer Madness for for this century.

Resisting the Green Dragon is therefore particularly timely because it not only refutes the scientific case for dangerous manmade warming and other “crises,” but also exposes how environmental organizations use sophisticated media campaigns and even seek increased global governance to promote their agenda among policy makers, religious leaders, and youth.

“One of the greatest threats to society and the church today is the multifaceted environmentalist movement,” says Cornwall Alliance founder and national spokesman Dr. E. Calvin Beisner. “There isn’t an aspect of life that it doesn’t seek to force into its own mold.”

Many well-known Christian leaders agree. Focus on the Family’s Tom Minnery joined Family Research Council’s Tony Perkins, the Southern Baptist Convention’s Ethics and Religious Liberty Commission’s Richard Land, Concerned Women for America’s Wendy Wright, Home School Legal Defense Association’s Michael Farris, National Religious Broadcasters’ Frank Wright, WallBuilders’ David Barton, and radio talk-show host Janet Parshall in filming introductions and commentary for the 12-part DVD series, which started shipping last week.

They make radical environmentalism look quite sexy in comparison to themselves, don’t you find? Hopefully this will backfire on them, enticing good wholesome Christian teens over to… the green side!.

Beware The Green Dragon! (Right Wing Watch)

Posted by Richard Metzger | Discussion
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