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Butthole Surfers’ Gibby Haynes, college jock
06.04.2014
09:02 am

Topics:
Music
Punk
Sports

Tags:
Butthole Surfers
Gibby Haynes

Gibby Haynes
 
It don’t get a whole lot better than this. Many people have seen that news story from the 1970s of Guided By Voices frontman Bob Pollard throwing a no-hitter in college. Quite recently we posted a pic of a newspaper article about Stephen Malkmus, later of Pavement, from his high school days describing his exploits of playing in a punk band and also playing soccer for the high school team.
 
Gibby Haynes
 
But it turns out that Gibson “Gibby” Haynes of the Butthole Surfers was a star forward for his basketball team when he attended Trinity University in San Antonio. That’s right: The mastermind behind Locust Abortion Technician and Rembrandt Pussyhorse averaged 11.5 points a game and 4.7 rebounds as the starting forward on Trinity’s team. As we can see, Gibby was an “Accounting and economics major,” which makes sense given that he once landed a gig at a top accounting company in the area. Note that he also made the Dean’s List—kids, stay in school and you too can become as upstanding a citizen as Gibson Haynes!
 
Below, the full Blind Eye Sees All live concert video, shot in Detroit in 1985.
 

 
via WFMU and Marc Masters

Posted by Martin Schneider | Discussion
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Joe Strummer, marathon runner?
05.27.2014
05:36 am

Topics:
Music
Sports

Tags:
Joe Strummer
running


 
Oh dear. I’ve been able to avoid exercise for so long with the excuse, “sports aren’t punk.” Now I’m not entirely sure how I’ll defend my slothly blogger physique. It appears Joe Strummer was quite the athlete. The photo above is from the 1983 London Marathon, where Strummer ran for leukemia with a team from The Sun newspaper(???). He even purportedly finished with a time of four hours and 13 minutes! (I know that’s impressive because I Googled it.)

Strummer also claimed to have ran in the Paris Marathon, but there seems to be some doubt as to whether he was just pulling our leg. When ticket sales to support Combat Rock were faltering, he “disappeared” to Paris to up the publicity of the album. Below is a clip from the documentary, Joe Strummer: The Future Is Unwritten, where he casually mentions running the Paris Marathon, in passing. I tend to believe he ran it, but I also don’t fault anyone else for being skeptical—the man was known to stretch the truth. A journalist once asked about his training regimen and he balked until finally offering this questionable advice:

Okay, you want it, here it is: Drink 10 pints of beer the night before the race. Ya got that? And don’t run a single step at least four weeks before the race … But make sure you put a warning in this article, ‘Do not try this at home.’ I mean, it works for me and Hunter Thompson, but it might not work for others. I can only tell you what I do.

Maybe he didn’t think sports were too punk either? Don’t worry all you punk athlete kids out there, they can call you a jock, but they can’t take away your leather jacket! Keep running, I’ll be cheering you on from the couch!
 

Posted by Amber Frost | Discussion
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Andy Kaufman’s bizarre ‘My Dinner with Andre’ parody


 
In 1981, the Louis Malle-directed My Dinner with Andre was released to instant and lasting acclaim. The daring film had almost no conventional narrative, and revolved entirely around a lengthy and intense dinner conversation between old friends played by theater director Andre Gregory and the absolutely wonderful actor/playwright Wallace Shawn. (If for nothing else, you surely know him as “Vizzini” in The Princess Bride. If you haven’t read his work, maybe consider giving his Essays collection a whirl, for starters. He is quite brilliant.) Thanks to the charm of the two performers and the compelling content of the conversation, this risky and limited conceit worked.

Given its massive critical success and utterly distinctive character, the film has been parodied and used as a punchline countless times across all media. A favorite of mine was a throwaway sight gag in a 1993 Simpsons episode which showed the effete Martin Prince character playing a My Dinner with Andre arcade game.
 

 
But perhaps the very first parody/homage/whatever to emerge was the Andy Kaufman gem My Breakfast With Blassie. Where Andre featured a perceptive meaning-of-life debate between two patrician theater mavens in an elegant Manhattan restaurant, My Breakfast with Blassie presented two wrestlers—Kaufman, who was immersed in his bizarre late-career wrestling phase at the time (thus the neck brace), and actual legendary wrestling world figure “Classy” Freddie Blassie—spending an hourlong and oft-interrupted chat burnishing their own egos and griping about germs and the banality of small-talk over greasy food in a noisy, homely diner. You also get to see Blassie totally beat Dr. Atkins to the low-carb punch. The film was released direct to videocassette in late 1983, only months before Kaufman’s death from cancer. It’s been reissued on DVD twice, once in 2000, bundled with the I’m From Hollywood documentary about Kaufman’s wrestling exploits, and on its own in 2009. It turned up on YouTube last week, so you can see it right here if you like, but you might want to watch it soon, in case it gets yanked.
 

 
After the jump, Kaufman and Blassie talking about the project on Late Night with David Letterman...

Posted by Ron Kretsch | Discussion
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Andy Warhol, wrestling fan?


 

“I’m speechless. I just don’t know what to say.”

At some point during the 1980s, it made sense that MTV would try do something to take advantage of the pop culture juggernaut that was the World Wrestling Federation and some perceived rock/wrestling crossover that probably just boiled down to Cyndi Lauper’s dad being played by Captain Lou Albano in her “Girls Just Want to Have Fun” video and little else.

“The War to Settle the Score” was a series of WWF matches with a storyline that involved Albano, Lauper and her manager David Wolff (I won’t bother to explain it in detail, but Albano was a manager and Wolff and Lauper are trying to steal clients.) “Rowdy” Roddy Piper got pissed off about the whole MTV connection and this brought another “feud” into the storyline, but also in real life.

Piper was disqualified from the championship match against Hulk Hogan and a brawl erupted.  At one point, Cyndi Lauper, who had rushed the ring with Mr. T to support Hogan, was kicked in the head.

Since the event was live, MTV had cameras set up backstage to interview Hogan, Lauper, Mr T and Albano afterwards, but Andy Warhol apparently opened the wrong door and was pulled into an impromptu interview with “Mean Gene” Okerlund.

You’ll notice that Okerlund refers to the Pope of Pop as a “one of the greatest wrestling fans” at the end.
 

Posted by Richard Metzger | Discussion
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Racist L.A. Clippers owner Donald Sterling is also an egomaniac who runs terrible, self-obsessed ads
04.28.2014
06:17 am

Topics:
Race
Sports

Tags:
Donald T. Sterling

Donald T. Sterling
 
So it turns out that the owner of the L.A. Clippers, Donald T. Sterling, is a loathsome racist who told his girlfriend V. Stiviano that recent photographs of her and Magic Johnson bothered him “a lot, that you want to broadcast that you’re associating with black people.” Naturally the media jumped on this and Sterling has been ridiculed and denounced just about everywhere. In racist Amerikkka, it’s nice to have such a clear-cut, undeniable example of racism so that even the “somewhat” racist crowd have an opportunity to prove how not-racist they are.

In addition to harboring these loathsome views, Sterling has committed some other unpardonable sins, first and foremost being just about the nastiest thing I could ever think to call anyone, a West Coast version of Donald Trump. Attentive readers of the L.A. Times will be familiar with these bizarre advertisements sprinkled about occasionally in which Sterling is touting not so much any enterprise he’s associated with, but Donald T. Sterling himself.

Here’s Irvine resident and astute blogger Kevin Drum describing the horror:
 

He gives away lots of money, and when he does he makes sure everyone knows about it. Ads thanking Sterling for his good deeds simply litter the Times. ... They’re all the same: they have terrible, amateur production values; they all use the exact same cutout portrait of Sterling; and they all feature photos of the people honoring Sterling that look like they were taken with a 60s-era Instamatic. These ads appear multiple times a week. Sometimes multiple times a day. Sterling is constantly being honored for something or other, and every single honor is an occasion for him to advertise the fact in the LA Times. And always with the exact same cutout photo of himself. It’s kind of creepy.

 
Here’s an example, taken from Sunday’s paper:
 
Donald T. Sterling
 
Here are a couple other examples of the light Sterling touch, always with the same stupid photo:
 
Donald T. Sterling
 
Donald T. Sterling
 
While we’re cataloguing the bizarre workings of Sterling’s brain, I have to mention quickly this amazing thing that Josh Marshall at TPM caught over the weekend. In 2003 Sterling sued a former mistress of his to get back the house he once gave her. Asked to identify his own handwriting, Sterling answered as follows (the questioner’s follow-up is just about the funniest thing ever):
 
Donald T. Sterling
 
By the way, apparently Sterling’s racist views have been public knowledge for quite a while now. In addition to this helpful Deadspin guide to Sterling’s racism going back decades, here’s comedian/rapper/entrepreneur Nick Cannon on ESPN nine months ago having difficulty defending the owner of his favorite basketball team (jump to the 1:30 mark):
 

Posted by Martin Schneider | Discussion
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Craptastic: Vincent Price hosts ‘Strange But True: Football Stories’


 

“Sometimes pro football is like the Bermuda Triangle…. strange and unusual things happen that can’t be explained.”

Although it tries to come off like the Mondo Cane of NFL football or something, the Vincent Price-hosted Strange But True: Football Stories, a direct to VHS home video release from 1987 is basically just tales of uncanny victories, player superstitions and dumb luck. A few stories are more amusing than others, but all in all, one has to wonder just how desperate Vincent Price was for a paycheck at this stage of his career by agreeing to host this In Search Of meets the NFL lameness. I want to believe he shot this piece of crap in a day to underwrite the purchase of an expensive painting or a bottle of fine wine. It’s basically stories of unlikely wins with scary music and Price showing up every once in a while. He doesn’t come off as much of a football fan, does he?

From the back of the VHS box:

Travel off the beaten path with Vincent Price as he unearths the strange plays and bizarre players who have inhabited the NFL for the past half century.

Step right up and see for yourself the one-eyed quarterback who led the NFL in passing one year. Meet the player whose diet consisted of blood and raw meat. See weird team rituals. The strangest games. Discover the fattest achievers who ever played. And relive such out-of-this-world plays as “the Holy Roller,” “The Immaculate Reception” and “The Miracle of the Meadowlands.

So enter, if you dare, into the weird, wild and wacky world of the NFL. This is one fantastic voyage you won’t want to miss.”

That’s pretty debatable unless you’re a glutton for punishment. But it tries so hard…
 

 
More supernatural sports with Vincent Price after the jump…

Posted by Richard Metzger | Discussion
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Prepare to shit yourself (or take a Xanax before watching this!)
04.15.2014
12:26 pm

Topics:
Sports

Tags:
Mountain biking


 
“Heigh-Ho, Heigh-Ho, it’s off the cliff I go!”

I literally clenched my ass cheeks the entire time I watched this batshit POV helmet cam filming a bonkers downhill mountain bike competition. From what I understand, this was part of a Red Bull Rampage tournament. Good lord, how much adrenaline does one need? One false move or wrong turn would put you in a wheelchair for life, right?!

This is one crazy motherfucker.

 
Via reddit

Posted by Tara McGinley | Discussion
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Death defying: Helmet cam captures terrifying motorcycle accident
04.02.2014
10:29 am

Topics:
Sports

Tags:
motorcycles

ekibtnedicca.jpg
 
Motorcyclist Jack Sanderson was incredibly lucky to walk away with only minor injuries after his bike crashed on the Cat and Fiddle Road, in Buxton, England.

The accident happened after Sanderson overtook two motorbikes and swerved to avoid an approaching car, as he told the BBC:

” I was too impatient. I should have stayed on the white line, I saw the car, and thought right I’m going to have to go off there.

“I’m just happy to walk away with my life and maybe it could be a lesson to others. If it slows anyone down by just one mph then that’s something.”

Sanderson was thrown from his 600cc Kawasaki bike down a 40 ft embankment. The whole accident was filmed by Sanderson’s helmet camera and he posted the video on YouTube to warn other cyclists and drivers.  You might want to skip ahead to around the 2:10 mark.
 

 
Via the Manchester Evening News.

Posted by Paul Gallagher | Discussion
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The lost art of surfer movie tickets
03.24.2014
02:00 pm

Topics:
Art
Movies
Sports

Tags:
Surfing
Endless Summer


 
Movie tickets are not something to which we give a lot of thought from an aesthetic point of view, and really why should we?  They exist to be torn in half within minutes of purchase. The generic, bluish, thermally printed and perfectly utilitarian stubs we’re used to today were preceded in my youth by the classic red “ADMIT ONE” tabs that did the job just fine in the days when most cinemas had only one or two theaters.

So it was a truly pleasant surprise to find The Gallery of Surf Classics’ trove of 1960s surf movie ticket stubs. Many are very plain, but some of the graphic tickets are marvelous. Now, apart from breakouts like Bruce Brown’s classic The Endless Summer, surf movies weren’t nearly as mainstream as the Frankie & Annette beach party movies that simplified the culture for America’s landlocked. (As a Cleveland kid and a great indoorsman who doesn’t doesn’t tend to much get hung up on the whole So-Cal vibe, movies formed the basis of my knowledge of surf culture, to which I’m a consummate outsider.) These were essentially niche sports documentaries that screened in high school auditoria and civic rec centers, so I find it pretty amazing that anyone would have taken the time and expense to craft such elaborate tickets for these films.
 

The Endless Summer, 1964
 

Walt Phillips’ Once Upon a Wave, 1963
 

Grant Rohloff’s Too Hot To Handle, 1963
 
More after the jump…

Posted by Ron Kretsch | Discussion
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‘U.S.A! U.S.A!’ George Washington dunking on Kim Jong-un. Because America!!!

George Washington dunks on Kim Jong-un
 
A few weeks ago, Redditor fact_school_cat called for an ass-kicking bit of counterfactual patriotic sports propaganda:
 

There is not nearly enough art depicting our country’s Founders playing basketball, a game which was not invented until 100 years after the final colony ratified the Constitution. I want this art…

I haven’t quite decided on content, but I’m thinking either a team of Founding Fathers versus international enemies (think Kim Jong Eun — a real basketball fan) or versus a team of my least favorite players (think Andray Blatche). The game should probably take place in Philadelphia’s basketball arena.

This is a strange but serious request.

 
Redditor I_may_be_Dead (Aaron Needham) has stepped up. That’s the painting he came up with. It’s the best thing I’ve seen in weeks.

I love the detail of Honest Abe Lincoln boxing out Uncle Joe Stalin in the background. You can reach Needham for further commissions at his website or at aaronm.needham@gmail.com.
 
via Deadspin

Posted by Martin Schneider | Discussion
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