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Furtive fecal felon breaks into people’s homes and poos in their toilets
04:50 am


Poo Man

A furtive fecal felon, dubbed “The Poo Man” (“Bajsmannen”) has been breaking into people’s homes in the town of Mariestad, Sweden, and taking a dump in their toilets. Mariestad’s toilet invader made headlines in the Aftonbladet newspaper after the Poo Man’s foul deeds were reported on TV crime show Brottscentralen, where one of his victims was interviewed. According to The Local:

Hosts on the show said the incident had developed into “an unusual, uncomfortable, and utterly revolting pattern.”

“A man or woman has repeatedly made their way into people’s apartments and done their business in the toilet,” one of the programme hosts explained.

“Without flushing, we should add,” the co-host added.

Since last summer, the Poo Man has left a noxious call card at four different households, visiting one of the victims, Emmeli Johansson, on four separate occasions. Ms. Johansson said she rued the fact that neither her landlord nor the police took her complaint seriously, and explained how she was forced to change her locks. Though this trail of devastation (defecation?) has led to many puns, jokes and assorted banter, Brottscentralen‘s reporters reminded residents “that the crime was actually a serious one”:

“It’s easy to laugh about it, but it’s really uncomfortable when you realize that a pattern is developing,” they said.

An anonymous caller to The Local explained that the suspect could be “the legendary poop man” who hits music festivals around the country, covering himself in human excrement from the festivals’ portable toilets. The caller’s claims remain unconfirmed.

Meanwhile, it’s unknown whether the Poo Man is still on the run, or bunged-up somewhere… we can only hope this fecal terrorist washed his hands after using the facilities…

With National Toilet Paper Day coming up on August 26th, here are ten facts about you know what…

H/T Arbroath

Posted by Paul Gallagher | Leave a comment